I asked God for a miracle, and it didn’t happen. Was God listening?

As Catholic Christians, we have been formed in the spiritual life to believe in the necessity of prayer and the power of prayer. But we must admit that at times, we doubt the efficacy of prayer when our prayers are not heard. Someone we love was diagnosed with cancer and we prayed for a miracle for their healing, and months later, they died. Why was my prayer not answered? We may suffer from chronic pain, and we ask God for a miracle to relieve us from this heavy cross, but the pain continues. Why did my plea go unheard? When miracles are not granted, we may begin to doubt not only the power of prayer, but also God's love and concern for us. To avoid this hapless state, we should consider the Catholic understanding of the purpose and nature of Christian prayer.
 
When we pray for a miracle, we pray that God’s will be done. From all eternity, God has a providential plan for all His creation, including for my life. In His wisdom, God has determined what is best for me, to guide me along the path to eternal life in heaven. Therefore, in His divine will, there are graces and blessings waiting to unfold in my life, even miracles. When I pray, I am not changing God's holy will, but I am opening the door to the reception of these blessings which are the fruit of prayer. God has eternally desired to grant us certain blessings but respects our human will and our desire to ask for these blessings. 
 
Some may object to this understanding of the purpose and benefits of prayer by pointing to Matthew 7: 7-8, which says, “Ask, and you shall receive; seek, and you shall find; knock, and the door shall be open to you.” They did ask, seek and knock at the door for a miracle, but their intention was ignored. Perhaps we should revisit this beautiful passage on prayer from Matthew's Gospel and do so with an attitude of abandonment to God's will. Yes, we should ask in prayer, convinced that we will receive what God believes is best for us. We should seek in prayer, knowing that we will obtain the grace God intends for us. We should knock at the door and be content with which door will be opened to us with the accompanying blessing. So, when we pray, it is not wrong to pray for miracles, but we should keep in mind the words of the Our Father that we pray time and time again, “Thy will be done.” The essence of prayer is not merely telling God our needs but reminding us of our need for Him and the unfolding of His divine will for my salvation.
 
On another level, we must address the hurt and pain that result when the prayer for a miracle seems to be denied by God. This is especially true when a miracle for the relief from suffering and the preservation of life is at hand. We seek answers to that perennial question, “Why would a loving God allow these tragedies to happen?” But with the gift of faith granted by God, we come to the belief that all things have meaning, even those sufferings we must endure. Assuredly in the life to come, we will understand completely why God's will unfolded as it did in my life. But with God's grace, we may begin to see already in this life why certain prayers, including prayers for miracles, were denied us, because God had greater blessings in mind. 
 
For example, just after her retirement, my mother suffered a massive stroke that left her paralyzed on her left side for the rest of her life. The stroke lasted for a few seconds, but it did a lifetime of damage. She spent the last 12 years of her life in a nursing home, away from her husband and her home. She, along with her family, wondered why God did not grant her the gift of a miracle to heal her so that she could resume the life she once loved. But then prayer brought clarity, and she understood the reason why her request for a miracle was denied. Our diocesan vocations director at the time, Monsignor Thomas Richter, visited my mother, along with other residents of her nursing home, and asked that they offer their sufferings daily for the intention of vocations to the priesthood for the Bismarck Diocese. These suffering individuals were an important factor in the considerable number of vocations that our diocese has experienced. 
 
Monsignor Richter’s nephew, Father Steven Vetter, our current vocations director, has also encouraged suffering people to offer their sufferings for the same intention. A glance at how many seminarians are on our new vocations poster shows that these sufferings, offered to God, continue to bear fruit. So, when God denies us a miracle, He has an even greater blessing in mind, not only for us, but for other members of the Body of Christ. In faith, we will come to realize that when our prayer for a miracle was denied, our prayers were answered, but in a different and meaningful way.
 
As Christians, we are not afraid to bring all our intentions before God, including asking for miracles. God may have determined this blessing from all eternity and the miracle will be granted to us when we seek it in prayer. But we should always remember that God may have a different plan for us, because His wisdom far surpasses ours. When we prayerfully review our life, we humbly and joyfully admit that the life God has planned for me is far more beautiful than the life I had planned for myself.